Morons of a Feather...

This guy makes it so easy!

This is a followup to something I posted a while ago, regarding Ben Stein’s notorious ‘exposé’ (pardon me...LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL), ‘Expelled, No Intelligence Allowed’. Now, right off the bat, if you’ve seen this film and aren’t blown out of your undergarments by the absolutely hilarious irony of the title (and, it gets better), you’re either comatose, or have a personality disorder rendering you impervious to situational humor (there’s somebody around here like that...hmmmmmm).

I’m not sure if I’ve ever mentioned it here before, but I expose myself to very little ‘news’ these days, television, print or otherwise; other than what I run across by accident, that is. Things used to be different. I once was what is commonly known as a ‘news junkie’. I read several newspapers cover to cover, plus all the major weekly mags, PLUS I was hooked into radio news and talkshows almost from the moment I woke up to the time I went to bed (I was in construction at the time, and wore one of those garish radio sets on top of my head). This went on for years and years. When I started doing a lot of late night work remodeling doctor’s offices after hours, I even listened to Art Bell, as well as the far, far left Pacifica channel in L.A. But somewhere along the way, I simply got burned out on information, and now I don’t have much to do with the whole mess. To demonstrate how bad it’s gotten, I just found out last month that Peter Jennings had died! Hehehehehe! Yep, I am SERIOUSLY out of the loop, it seems. Like Thoreau, I’ve adopted the attitude that most of what we deem newsworthy, and so goddamned important that we MUST be privy to all the details, pretty much boils down to socially acceptable and self-important gossip.

Anyway, I gather that FOX has pretty much taken over the airwaves these days. My conservative mother swears by them, but if what I’ve seen on my visits to her home are any indication, it seems the inmates have taken over the asylum. I mean, is this Bill O’Reilly guy a fucking putz, or what? But I’ve found somebody worse. His name is Glenn Beck. I came across this clip while researching Stein’s movie, and was amazed that this utter doofis actually has his own show. What a fucking joke! Where do they get these people, anyway. Aren’t there more qualified news-persons out there looking for work? Jesus, it took me two or three tries to get beyond this goof’s obvious insufficiencies before I could even concentrate on the substance of his conversation, if ‘substance’ can even be used appropriately in this case. Anyway, I meant to post this video a lot earlier, but got sidetracked and totally spaced it. Here you go...



Oh my! “If the New York Times hates a movie, you’re gonna love it? Well, I’ve got a movie that the New York Times hates! It’s called ‘Expelled’, so you know it’s gotta be good!” Jesus Christ in a dumptruck! Doesn’t this guy know he’s poisoning his own well before the first bucket’s been drawn? Or is he just broadcasting on some public access channel in Crawford County? And what’s with that delivery? Is this supposed to seem homespun, or sumpin’? Yeesh!

Next, Ben Stein is introduced, and Beck says “You are the smartest guy I know”, to which Stein replies “No I’m not, I’m very stupid when compared with you.” I’ve gotta be fair here, and put them on an equal footing. Which is disappointing. In fact, I’d imagine a lot of Americans are disappointed. Stein’s always had this image of being a pretty astute fella from what I’ve seen in the past. On the other hand, O.J. was supposedly a nice guy, and look how THAT turned out. Ah, Hollywood! Silk purses, and all that.

After lamenting the fact that his child(ren?) is ‘learnin’ stuff in college(sic)’, Beck decides it might be informative to actually read the Times movie review...um...outloud. Hahahahaha! Even I was squirming for Ben! ‘Sleazy. Conspiracy Theory Rant. Unprincipled. Propaganda. Insults believers and non-believers alike.’ Immediately after which, Beck encourages all religious folks to go out and see it. Amazing! He and Stein then go on to talk about the ‘standing ovations’ the movie received all over the country. I can’t help but wonder if the crowds were anything like the one in the movie, gathered in a university to hear Stein speak. Turns out, they couldn’t actually get any real turnout from the students, so they packed the auditorium with a fake audience, much like Lyle Waggoner’s in one of the original infomercials hawking penile implants.

They then move on to a clip from the movie, the Dawkins interview I covered previously. Stein asks Dawkins how science might go about looking for traces of intelligent design in Terran biology. Dawkins explains briefly how we might look for markers evidencing some otherworldly machinations by, say, aliens from another planet. Of course, the segment of the interview Beck uses conveniently begins AFTER Stein has asked his original question, which leaves Dawkins looking like he is arguing for the extraterrestrial position, instead of merely answering Stein’s ‘what if?’. Utterly dishonest; and, in fact, even Stein pulls the same bullshit right in the film in his role of voiceover narrator, when he says “Wait a second! Richard DAWKINS thought intelligent design might be a legitimate pursuit?” No. Ben STEIN just thought he’d pull a fast one by framing Richard Dawkins answer in the wrong context.

Beck then has a little chuckle over the idea that Dawkins can infer (in Beck’s and Stein’s imaginations, anyway) that he is willing to invoke ANY creator EXCEPT for the bronze age bush burning thunder deity of the Old Testament. First of all, Dawkins isn’t invoking anything, he’s simply doing his best to answer what turns out to be a bad-faith question in terms of naturalistic science. This amuses our boys to no end, since of course they’re privy to the knowledge that life really arrived on Earth via the magic powers of an invisible, intangible superbeing who can design a universe on a whim, yet is too stupid to put a fence around a goddamned apple tree! For shame, Richard...you’ve been sooooo punked!

What follows is the usual litany of denigratory phrases batted back and forth like an infidel shuttlecock at the God-Fearers badminton tournament and fish-fry. Atheists are arrogant. Atheists are miserable. Athiests are overly-defensive of unproven theories. Atheists are shortsighted. Atheists are closeminded. Oh, and my favorite. Scientists aren’t REALLY about science; they’re simply ‘anti-God’. Well, let’s see. Chemistry, medicine, physics, astronomy, as well as the host of technology-based disciplines that have allowed idiots like these two to proclaim their idiotic beliefs across the world via the several means of mass communication available because of...what was it? Oh yeah! It was SCIENCE! Hm...in other words, both these chaps are making their livings from advancements made at least in great part by anti-Godders. Imagine that!

Oh yeah, I almost forgot. Stein once again reminds us that evolution doesn’t explain gravity, nor thermodynamics, nor abiogenesis. Duh, duh, and duh. Geology doesn’t explain why my knee hurts, either. So.the.fuck.what? And one other thing...atheists have no morals. Not real ones, anyway. Not the kinds you can be eternally punished for breaking. Good thing God doesn’t punish for rampant stupidity, I guess.

Finally, remember my ‘and it gets better’ remark? Beck signs off with ‘Go see the movie. It’s called ‘Exposed’. LOLOLOLOL! As if ‘No Intelligence Allowed’ wasn’t enough! I literally laughed my upper intestine out through my nose. The dog got ahold of it, I had to chase her around the house to get it back, and let me tell you it was a real bitch shoving that sucker back into place! All that, and it never DID explain thermodynamics. Arrogant, close-minded upper intestine! Anyway, like Stein reminds us, there IS an intelligent creator, and his name is G.O.D. Geodie? Sounds Italian. Ah! Now I understand the Vatican connection!


UPDATE: 'Expelled, No Intelligence Allowed' received a 10% freshness rating at the 'Rotten Tomatoes' movie reviews website. I thought I'd cut and paste some off the first page for your amusement:


To grant Expelled any credibility beyond the opening minutes requires nothing short of a leap of faith.


Might there be a way to get to God through science? It's a fascinating notion and I wish the slickly produced Expelled investigated it more thoroughly.


This film is cheerfully ignorant, manipulative, slanted, cherry-picks quotations, draws unwarranted conclusions, makes outrageous juxtapositions, segues between quotes that are not about the same thing, tells bald-faced lies, etc.


Expelled is a classic bait-and-switch, presenting itself as a plea for freedom in the scientific marketplace of ideas, while actually delivering a grossly unfair, contradictory, and ultimately repugnant attack on Darwinists.


Despite some occasionally sloppy filmmaking, I think the picture is worth a look. It raises important ideas and issues, asks important questions. No one could argue against that, right? Bueller...Bueller...Bueller... (this is a postive one!)


Regardless of your personal views, Expelled's heavy-handed bias (a visit to Darwin's home gets the same eerie music as a tour of Dachau) is exasperating.


Like Moore, whose documentary-cum-polemical style they are clearly imitating, the makers of Expelled give their critics too much ammunition, so even if you're sympathetic to some of the ideas and the underlying argument, it is still difficult to defend.
Junk science meets even junkier filmmaking in Expelled -- a no more shameless, stupid and loathsome piece of propaganda has ever skulked its way into the theater.


Ignorance may be bliss, but encouraging it, as Expelled does, ought to be a crime.


works in much the same way as a Michael Moore documentary -- a raft of provocation and very little persuasion


Don't expect any serious debate here about God and evolution. This documentary is like watching a paranoiac making fun of a hysteric.


I don't say the film is crap because I disagree with it. I say it's crap because it disagrees with itself. It teems with contradictions, false dichotomies, and specious reasoning.

And much, much more...

DOUBLE UPDATE: Btw, and lest I be accused of being unfairly selective in my targeting, one of these negative reviews is by Roger Ebert, main butt-buddy of faux-documentarian and all around obnoxious tweaker of the truth Michael Moore. Long story short, Ebert never met a leftie he didn't like, and some of his reviewing suffers immensely because of it. The guy pans 'Zoolander' because the sub-plot revolves around the murder plot of a national leader in a comedic way, then gives a green light to 'American Dreamz', a comedic take on the attempted assassination of George W. Bush, as well as a film my younger daughter (aspiring film maker and critic) calls 'perhaps the worst film I've ever seen in my life'(and believe me, she'll watch ANYTHING!). Not to mention 'Wag the Dog', another leftist piece of thinly veiled, propagandist dreck. But next to 'Expelled', Moore's 'Fahrenheit 911' is the epitome of objectivity; a fact which is in and of itself, tragic.